Did you ever feel like you are looking through a kaleidoscope when your struggling to see your life a certain way? Life can often feel like a blurry jumble and we can so easily get discouraged and feel like all our plans are all running together. Like nothing is turning out the way we expected.
I read an article by Derek Harvey recently about how the biggest relationship killers are unmet expectations. I don’t think any of us really realize how true that is. Our thoughts are powerful things and in our heads we build neat and tidy expectations for everyone we are in relation with. Especially our spouses. And if you really think about it most times when we get upset and feel like life isn’t going our way or we can’t see things clearly it’s probably just us needing to adjust our expectations.
I can tend to be a bit of a pessimist, a glass half empty kind of person if I don’t remind myself to keep turning the kaleidoscope and enjoy the constant changing shapes and colors of life. Most times when I am being pessimistic it’s because I have some silly unmet expectation about what I “thought up in my head” of how I wanted something to turn out. However, there is a freedom in letting go of unmet expectations and realizing we are the author of our life story. We cannot let circumstances and anger over unmet expectations decide our happiness. We cannot let others make up our story. I like the saying “when writing the story of your life don’t let anyone else hold the pen.” But sometimes we ruin the beauty of our stories by trying to write things to be too predictable and perfect. No one wants to read a novel without all the excitement of a good mystery to solve or some drama or romance that’s playing out. And of course the anticipation of not knowing what happens is what sees a reader through to the end.
So it is with life. Remember, there is a time for everything. That means the good and the bad, the confusing and the sad, the joy and the celebrations, they are all part of the story of life. Don’t get too held down by unmet expectations. Don’t get stuck in one part of your story! Write yourself a next chapter, be more present, do more to help others and have more fun in this chapter. Don’t be thrown off by the crazy kaleidoscope of life,lay back in the grass under the sun and smile at all the change.